Admit

What do you do when the person you trust betrays you publicly? Most people me included prefer to pretend it is less than it is. You act like it doesn't bother you. That you are not deeply wounded. That is my denial. My pre-recovery addictive reaction. Now, I have to deal with that pain. And how I react or better yet prepare for the inevitable pain of moving through this. Belief in My Heavenly Father and that all will be right. He will be by my side through out. But it is so difficult for me to always see him and feel him next to me. I feel so alone. I know that is my carnal body; not my spiritual deeper side. Delving into the bible and truly divining His purpose and lesson for me. Next to difficult for me to see.

Pharmaceuticals are helpful to a point. But sometimes they are just like alcohol or any other addictive behavior. They can be abused and become detrimental. I think a new church; a new fellowship may just what I need. Let me make a concerted effort to pray, read the the bible, go to bible study, CR/SHIFT. Involved and healing. That is what I need to be involved in. Help me. Lord.